Positive Identity

Hello Everyone,

I hope you had a good weekend. I am so sad about Eight Belles who had to be put to sleep after breaking her front legs at the Kentucky Derby. She was the only filly to run and came in second before falling. Those horses try so hard and run their hearts out. I just hate it that it has to kill one of them. :(

Today we will finish with the 40 Developmental Assets. The last group of the internal assets is the Positive Identity Assets.

I will quote/paraphrase Search Institute here:

Solidifying identity is the primary task of adolescence, according to Erik Erikson...The hope is that the identity will be positive. Youth programs can give messages in multiple ways that reinforce self-esteem and belief in oneself and the ability to affect ones's future. In fact, all of the other asset categories work together to build positive identiites.

And I believe that is true. Relationship building, listening, empowerment, competencies, affirming, supporting, etc. all help a young person feel better about him or herself.

But here are some tips:

Use positive language to influence youth's perceptions of themselves. (For example, we tell youth who call in on our crisis line that they are courageous.)

Look for ways that youth can be successful

Be alert to special talents, aptitudes and passions in youth

Enlarge youth's vision of their future and reinforce optimism

Ensure that you and the other adults around speak positively about themselves and each other

Where possible, celebrate cultural heritages of the youth

Expect young people to experience ups and downs of self-esteem during these years

Avoid comparing young people with other young people

Let teenagers know that you are proud of and excited by their talents, capabilities, and discoveries.

Support teenagers as they struggle with issues and questions of identity

Let teenagers know that you are willing to listen if they want to talk about their sense of purpose in life, including their ideas about how they would like to contribute to the world.

And I would add to use the strengths perspective. Catch youth doing something right. Notice their good points.

And most importantly, accept and affirm who they are, not just what they do. So many youth today have grown up with shame and humiliation. They need to feel they are okay for who they are.

You all have the opportunity to be that person in a youth's life. The one who helps them see themselves in a new positive light.

Till tomorrow
LA