Photos!!

Hi!

Thanks to Jesse, who you have met, we have more photos. I will put one on each day. The CD of photos is at SEN. Hopefully that will get uploaded soon.

Last night my home computer crashed. My son said it has the "blue screen of death". Oops. It feels like I have lost a friend.

Okay today we will look at the next SEN value:

We do with--not to--others.

So what does that mean? Aren't we helping youth?
Well, of course we are. But we are working WITH them. Unlike the medical field, we aren't fixing them. We aren't doing things to them. They are not passive receipients of our help and resources. They are not on the operating table with us poised with scalpels to carve into them and give them a new heart or head.

We respect them enough to ask them what they think and why they think it. We work with youth to help them develop the skills and identity they need to be successful. We don't tell them what they should do or think. We ask questions and encourage problem-solving and decision making skills. It is like the motto of teaching people to fish instead of just feeding them fish. Of course like Maslow's hierarchy of needs, we need to feed youth if they are hungry. But in our shelter, the youth cook the meals for each other. Many of them are learning to cook for the first time.

Partnership. This value is really about partnership. What does that mean? To me, partners are equal in value. One is not superior to the other. One does not have more power over the other. Both have input. Now we know that as adults we do have some power over youth, but as much as we can stay away from power struggles the better. As we say here, "once you are in a power struggle with a teen, you have lost."

Any relationship that is defined by power over another is a doomed one. It is as we come to each other in respect as equals that we have a chance to touch each other's lives. I have received just as much from youth as I have given. I bet you have too.

LA